Lincoln's new life
by FidgetSpina
Summary: Lincoln explore many alternate universes to find the perfect sister to live with permanently after he got sick of dealing with having ten sisters at the same times


Lincoln is an eleven-year-old boy with white hair who hates his sisters very much because they always ruined his chance, treat him like crap and worst of all, They never use Lincoln's suggestions for places that he wants to go because the sisters always go to the stupid mall

One day, Lisa finally give him a simulation pod where Lincoln can finally have a new life after he been begging her for the past five months

"Ok male sibling, All this thing work is that you can choose a life that you want and you can accept it"

"Finally, Now I can have a normal life with a single sister because having ten sisters is too fucking much like seriously did our parents even used condoms?"

"Lincoln, They were always planning to have ten kids since their family were very small"

"This is a dumb excuse like who the hell have ten kids in 2019?"

"Enough questions about this logic brother, Please enter the pod as it will granted your wish"

And so Lincoln enter the pod where Lisa gave him a controller so he can make his decision, She warns him that he can't return back in his timeline if he presses the red button

"Shut up Lisa, Just active the machine now"

"Okay, Good luck at finding your new life"

Lisa press the button which caused Lincoln to become unconscious since his mind warp to an alternate universe where he only has a sister When Lincoln wakes up, He sees that he have a normal room that he always wanted

"Finally, My room is not a fucking closet anymore"

Lincoln become happy and excited to see his alternate reality sister, He was hoping that she was nicer

"Oh boy, Let see who will be my sister in this timeline"

When Lincoln walks out to the hallways, He sees that his house is now small and it only feature 4 rooms, His bedroom, His sister's bedroom, His parent's bedroom, and the bathroom

"Finally, This house is way better and it not as broken like my old home"

So Lincoln was walking to the bathroom but unfortunately, he learned that his sister was, in fact, Lori who took his place, He hates her because she forces him to become Ronnie Anne's boyfriend and the fact her family won't shut up about them being a couple when they are actually just friends

"Hey Lori, I was here first!"

"Well twerp, I was born first!"

"Fuck I hate Lori because she is a mean heartless bitch"

Then Lincoln press the green button which send him in another universe, He walks out to the hallways only to see Leni who was crawling as she was trying to find something

"Hi Leni"

"Hi Lincoln, Have you found my phone"

"Leni you stupid fuck, Your phone is inside your pocket"

"Oh, Thank you Linky"

"Yeah, I don't want to deal with your stupidity so goodbye"

Then Lincoln press the green button again which send him in another universe, He walks out to the hallways only to see Luna

"Well Luna is one of my ten sisters that is normal so this won't be bad"

But unfortunately, He forgot that Luna always play loud music, He decided to go to another universe because he wants peace and quiet rather than loud music being played for five hours straight

"Sorry but I had to go because your songs fucking suck ass, Oh also Sam will never date you because of you're a girl dumbass, So you need to accept that girls can only date boys"

"What?"

Then he quickly goes in another universe, He realized that his following four sisters suck so he was about to skip four universes but then he realized that his original sisters were like that because of the bond they had with each other

"So Lincoln walks to the hallways where a water bucket falls on his head, He becomes angry with Luan that he went to her room to do a comeback

"Hey Luan, I see that you prank me today"

"HAHAHA yeah, You fall on that trick very easily"

"Wanna heard my new joke?"

"Sure brother, What it is?"

"What do you call a woman that never got on a date"

"Huh?"

"A psychopath who always do pranks on others"

"...Did you just call me a psychopath?"

"Yes because you are fifteen years old for fuck sake, You need to learn that pranks do harm to other peoples and improve your own joking skill because you suck at comedy right now"

Luan become sad after what her brother just said, Before she said anything, Lincoln suddenly vanish into another universe because he doesn't want to hear Luan's lame excuse, In his room, He was very prepared of what will Lynn do to him since she always plays rough on him

"Let do this"

When Lincoln open the door, He sees that Lynn was standing near as she was staring at him

"Hey Lincoln, Our football match is starting"

"Huh, What do you mean by football match?"

"Didn't you remember that you join my football team after you lose a bet"

"Oh hell no, I hate sports and I don't want to deal with your bullcrap"

Then Lincoln quickly press the button which made Lynn confused as she just witnesses her brother suddenly disappear

"What the heck was that He just pop out of existence..."

Later at Lincoln who was in an alternate universe where he was really tired of pressing the same button over and over, He decided to give Lucy a chance since he knows that Lucy is harmless and unlike his other sisters, She is not annoying and very quiet

So Lincoln was staying with his sister Lucy for two weeks before he found her to be boring as she always making poems, He notices that Lucy never hang out with him like playing video games or having fun in Dairyland together

"Yeah, Lucy suck because she has no emotions at all!"

So Lincoln press the button which send him in another universe, He went outside the house and see that Lana was cover in muds and was playing with her frogs

"Meh, I don't like being dirty and Lana can be disgusting sometimes so I am going to leave this universe"

"Hey Lincoln, Want to see a new trick Hops can do?"

"No, thank you"

Lincoln went back in his house where he presses the green button which sends him in a new alternate universe, He realized that Lola is a worse bitch than Lori was so he decided to beat her up since, in that universe, He has one sister instead of ten

"Good, Now I can do my ultimate revenge at Lola for everything she did to me in the past years"

Lincoln walks out of the hallways where he sees Lola who told him that she wants him to go at her tea party otherwise she will tell mom and dad about the fact he read comics in his underwear on the roof of the house yesterday

"You have two option Lincoln, I know you will go in my tea party because you always listen to me"

"Hahaha, I will teach you a lesson about why you shouldn't blackmail someone older than you"

"What are you going to do?"

"You will see because I hate you more than Lori and Lynn combine"

"Who the heck is Lori and Lynn?"

Then suddenly Lincoln start to beat Lola up in anger very badly, Twenty minutes later, Lola become unconscious and her nose was really bloody and she loses some of her teeth then Lincoln throw her out of the window to her death

"This what you get for blackmailing me, Bitch!"

Then he immediately went to another universe after pressing the green button, He knows that he has two sisters lefts, At first, he was planning to stay with Lisa because she makes cool inventions but then he realized that she has no social skills and the fact she makes dangerous experiments sometimes

"Well, Lisa was a good sister kind of..."

So Lincoln went to see Lisa at her room where she was making something"

"What are you doing?"

"I am making the Dowl, A hybrid between the owl and a deer"

"Cool, The Dowl sound really cute"

"Once I am done with this project, I will do an experiment on you"

"What are you going to do with me?"

"I will place your face on a train"

"Why?'

"Because I saw Shred 17 on youtube and it inspired me to transform you into a train"

"What the heck is Shed 17?"

"Shed 17 is a creepypasta of Thomas the tank engine train where it about humans being fused with trains"

"...Can I see the video to see if it is actually real"

"Sure brother"

And so Lincoln watch the whole video where he became speechless after how scary the video was, He will never see Thomas the same way again after it

"..."

"So what do you think about the video, Do you want to become a train just like Thomas"

"NO! Why in the whole wide world you want to turn your only brother into a train like what the heck you were thinking?"

"Please, I can transform you back into a human just like Thomas in project G-1 which is a sequel to Shed 17"

"Are you kidding me, They made a sequel to that scary creepypasta"

"Yes, And I see that you going to have a nightmare for weeks because of that"

"I blame you for it and I refused to become a train"

"Too bad because this is for experiments"

"This is why you don't deserve to have siblings because you always used them as a test subject"

"Not all the times"

"That is a lie so now I need to go in the bathroom"

"Okay, But we are still doing the experiments afterward"

"As if"

Then Lincoln went to the bathroom, He can't believe that Lisa just made him afraid of a cartoon that he doesn't want to see her ever again, He presses the button which sends him to an alternate universe where Lily is his only sister

"God, I realized nine of my ten sisters suck very badly like Lori is a bitch, Leni is dumb, Luan is a psychopath, Luna won't stop playing music all the times, Lynn is a bully, Lucy is boring as hell, Lana is dirty and disgusting, Lola is mean as hell and Lisa have no social skills at all"

Lincoln walks to the hallways as he has an expectation of Lily being the perfect sister with no negative but then he starts to smell her stinky diaper so he yells at his mom about her but sadly she told him to do the task

"Sorry Lincoln, I am busy at paying the taxes and making lasagna"

"Can Dad do it?"

"No Lincoln, Dad at work today so can you change Lily's diaper please"

"Urrgghh, Fine, I will change her diaper"

Lincoln didn't like changing his baby sister's diaper because only his older sisters do that task most of the times, So he tries to change her diaper but unfortunately he couldn't handle the very bad smell that he gave up

"Fuck this, She isn't perfect at all"

"Poo-Poo"

"Shut up Lily, Nobody like you because I know that you will become annoying and horrible just like your older sisters"

Lily become sad after what Lincoln said and he teleport to another dimension after pressing the button, He ends up in a room that has two bunks-bed, He thought that he has a twin brother in this alternate universe but then he learns that Clyde is his brother now when he sees a picture of him and Clyde together

"Oh cool, I always want Clyde as my brother"

But then he remembers that he doesn't have a mom since he is adopted just like Clyde by his dad, Lincoln dislike when two males or females kissing each other...He secretly wish that his best friend have normal parents instead of 2 dads

"Yeah, I rather being an only child with a mom instead of having a parent of the same gender"

So Lincoln press the button for the final time where he travels into the final alternate universe where he doesn't have siblings at all, He woke up in his room where he discovered that he lives in a new house which had two bedrooms and a toilet, He loves his new room because it had a TV so now he can watch cartoons in his own room

"Perfect, No more annoying ass siblings to deal with"

Lincoln was happy about this since he can finally live his new life with no chaos Since he never had siblings this mean he never had eyes bags, So Lincoln press the red button which caused the device to deactivate forever

"Yes, This is what I always want, Peace and Quiet"

Then Lincoln start to make ace savvy comics as he is still glad that Lisa allows him to keep his awful memories since he can turn the full house gang into villains, Two months later, He became the most popular kid than Chandler caused of his awesome comics

"I will never regret my decision"

Meanwhile back to the original alternate universe, We see that the ten sisters have been watching the screen where they became heartbroken after their brother said awful things to them during his big trip

"Wow, Lincoln literally hates us very badly that he thinks being an only child is awesome"

"Remember when I made the best dang brother song? Turns out that Lincoln is actually the worst dang brother ever"

"That is literally true Luna"

"Is this temporarily guys?"

"No Leni, This is now permanent because Lincoln press the red button which caused his body in the pod to be dead since his mind is forever stuck in that alternate universe's body"

"Wow, This is scary Lynn"

"Yup, To be honest, I want a much better brother that isn't lazy at all"

"I have a much better suggestion"

"What it is Lola?"

"Why not another sister like we are supposed to be a big family of girls so this would make more sense of having an eleven sister"

"I always wonder how we got a brother but I think he is secretly a trans-man"

"No Lana, Lincoln was always been a boy at birth and I literally don't even believe in transgender anyway"

"What is a trans man?

"It a man who was assigned female at birth"

"Oh, so you are a trans woman then?"

"No Leni, I am a true girl and I am just in my tomboy phase"

"Okay, So what are we going to do with Lincoln's dead body?"

"Sigh, His body will be throw in the dumpster, I will never forget about the times where he calls me lame and boring..."

And so the sisters de-plug the pod where they carry his lifeless body into the garbage but they realized that the cops will ask the question about why their brother is in the garbage so they decided to put his body into a volcano, Lisa grab her teleport gun and she teleport him inside of a volcano where his body immediately starts to melt

"Good, Now we literally won't have to deal with Lincoln ever again"

"This what he gets for lying at us about being bad luck, Interrupted our sister protocol fight, Not letting us be in his deluxe pool until much later, Not letting us ride in the limo until the day after, Posting our embarrassing videos online without our permission and many more!"

"Yes Lola, So what are we going to do with the closet which is our brother's room

"Well Leni, We should burn all of his stuff"

"No Lana, I got a brilliance idea"

"Are we going to get a new brother that is much better than Lincoln is?"

"No Lynn, It even much better than that"

"Huh?"

"It a surprise so please wait at the living room while I work on"

"Okay Lisa, Let see what you going to do"

And so her sisters went to the living room where they were waiting for Lisa to be done, She used her dimensional watch to open a big portal where she attaches a unicorn comic book into her fishing hook and cast in the portal

Meanwhile, A girl with a dark blue skirt and long white hair with an orange hair clip in the front was in her room, She was very bored as she wishes that she have a sister instead of having ten brothers then suddenly a portal appear out of nowhere

"Oh my god, It a portal!"

The girl was a little scared as she didn't expect about that but when she sees a unicorn comic book on the floor, She decided to enter the portal

"Well, here I go..."

After reaching the other side of the portal, She was greeted by a four-year-old girl who was excited to finally see her, She slaps herself to make sure that she wasn't dreaming since she can't believe what she just witnesses in her life

"What the heck just happened..."

"Welcome home sister, My name is Lisa and you will be happy to live with us than your world"

"...I am Linka and you are pretty much just like my brother Levi..."

"That right Linka, In this world, Everyone is the opposite gender"

"Cool, My wish has come true like I always want a sister anyway where is my male counterpart"

"Unfortunately, Your male counterpart Lincoln got killed in a bad accident two weeks ago...We do not like to speak about the incident"

"Ouch, Sorry for your loss of your brother"

"So want to stay in this universe permanent?"

"Oh heck yes, Now I won't have to deal with my annoying brothers who can be gross sometimes"

"Excellent, Follows me as your life will become awesome"

"Yay!"

And so Linka follows Lisa where she introduced the new sister at them, All of them were happy while Lynn was little disappointed about the fact she didn't get a brother but however she decided to give Linka a chance since there was no way she can be that lazy just like her former brother, They all introduce themselves to Linka who was very happy about it

"Wow, I can't believe you literally got a female version of Lincoln"

"So you turn our brother into a girl?"

"No Leni, Linka is from another universe where she has ten brothers"

"Oh, Well this is unexpected Lisa"

"This was very nice to meet all of you as my dream has officially come true!"

"Yes Linka, We are literally happy for you so now what do you want to do today?"

"Well Lori, I always want to go the mall but unfortunately my brothers refused to take me to that place since all they want is to go at stupid boy places such as Dairyland and Gus' Games"

"...She is literally perfect"

"Hey Linka, Do you love Tea?"

"Oh yes Lola, I do love drinking teas very much"

"Finally, I have a sister who loves tea!"

"Do you like frogs Linka"

"Well kinda since I have a frog stuffed toy back at my original home...I have a stuffed animals collection"

"Nice collection you have"

"Thanks, Lana, My brothers are annoyed with the fact I have many of them for some reason"

"The last question, Do you love ace savvy"

"Nope, Apparently my male counterpart loves that cliche superheroes comic series, What about you guys"

"No Linka, Ace Savvy is literally overrated"

"Interesting, My sisters and my brothers have the opposite opinions but same hobbies"

"Yes my dear sister so now let's go to the mall that you always want to go, I am glad that I invent this dimensional watch last month"

"Yay, I am going to buy many new stuffed toys and sells those crappy comic books that my male counterpart have"

"This is literally the best day of our life!"

"Me too Lori, Now I can abandon my dumb brothers forever"

The story ends with the loud sisters going to the mall with their new best sister Linka as she decided to stay with them forever, She will never regret her decision of it since this is what she always want, They were enjoying their new life as now they won't have to deal with craps that their brother has done with them


End file.
